Incarnated, Commissioned Pedigree: Tiger Year, First New Moon Virgo , born on Thors day at 630pm

[Link to the footnote annotated draft of this post]

Tiger Year

 first New Moon Virgo, on Thors day evening

This sequence was the predicate of my birth. From that birth I was accorded the entitlements of being born in that sequence with fortuitous sensory seedings that gave me hints and clues which individually teased my thinking. As those hints and clues aggregated I realized I had a role transcendent to the mundanities of possession and title trappings of others’ pursuits. I was the passive conduit for a presence that manifested the instrumentality of its equity and justice within my sensory boundaries.

I became aware of it, first, on the corner of E. Genesee and Westcott Street one cold, wintry, January day..

Years passed, and I had moments not as great as that wintry day, but they were times for me to say “Thanks!”. The presence was always in the background camouflaged in the animisms of the moment.

By the time of my senior year I had moved away from considering the words in the Scriptures as the final world on our morality, let alone ontological genesis. My newly developing iconoclasms tended to more metaphysical rhetoric, which brought me to the next serendipitous revelation of existential potentiality.

A dream I had just after the Christmas break was the beginning of the clue and signs for what the Presence was preparing my still very methodology-clueless mind by metaphors for what I was to face over my life. That dream was followed by several equally metaphorical, symbolic dreams to give me an orientation for my now pilgrim-seeking efforts.

Having few with whom to share the metas of my speculations, plus no longer having the intense time investment in the study of these metaphysics left me treading water and drifting away from considering anything more than the secular routine tasks I was facing weekly and yearly for most of the next decade.

Near the end of that decade of secular accommodation by me, I began to have dreams similar in their metaphoric import as the dream I had called, “The Dream-for the Record”. That began my intellectual reformation from being another temporal widget of hollowed-out spirituality. I knew there was a role for me to play but what would it be?

I got another clue from a feral-spirited co-worker who gave me a text of the Bhagavad Gita, in which two chapters- 3 & 18- provided me with purpose and guidance I needed. Ten years later I would receive a text, the ‘Futuh al-Ghaib’, that placed in perspective the futility of living in profane pursuits for having any expectations of blessings being bestowed on me for my efforts. The comprehension of the significant of these texts became the predicate for the next period of synchronistic blessings which showed me the fortuitous grace of being a devotee to the ethos of ‘the Presence’.

Having those confirming fortuitous serendipities and synchronicities as the refocusing of my attention and acknowledgement on the powers of the Presence, I entered a new chapter in the relationship with the Presence. It was giving me hints of its origin and obliged roles I’ would be doing for the sake of having the incidental contrast in my interactions with others person’s characters for the karma that would befall them: the street person, the weight lifter, the strange nurse, the gold-digger, the entrepreneur. By their inherently corrupt to vacuous ethics or their naive faith in false paradigms, they were the latest examples of the sometimes cruel and indifferent vindictiveness of karma.

I still was not thinking in terms beyond my carnal and temporal identity, so I was thinking of ethics in terms of what others weren’t doing than the broader purpose for why I should be scrupulous in my ethics-to create a context of aesthetic reference points for my own functional identity in being more than an adherent to a proscribe behavior. To the extent when I did react with ethical diligence, I set the preconditions for how others Karma would be divined.

All these interactions, particularly after I got on the internet in 1997, I retrospectively see as my latest efforts to have the social connections which weren’t feasible or possible in my life of anonymous marginality prior to the internet. In fact the ‘marginality’ I had perceived about my condition was a contrarian force for which ‘the ‘Gita’ and the other academic, mystical, plus occult texts had been seeding my mind. The irony of my further misanthropy in a world of greater social connectedness was driving me into conscious and incidental isolation and detachment from the culture and its social features. Even my present (and LAST carnal) marriage I found myself categorizing its 15+ year state as a partnership guided by existential preconditions for an ethical duty, than as the humanistic celebration of a joint intangible purpose beyond the nuts-and-bolt mechanics of a partnership.

I found that it was not being involved in a proactively direct, social dialogue and action that was either satisfying or effectual, but it was the indirect, proactivity in tuning and fine-tuning my ethical intent and actions in a more asocial, ascetically monastic self-dialogue and minimalistically necessary, imperative activity which best complemented the character of the manifestations of that Presence, guardian-mentor.

My carnal being’s social status and roles are coincidental, apocryphal and many time irrelevant footnotes to being the conduit that is resonantly in-synch, consciousness-wise with the ‘Presence of Cosmic Time and its elemental Substance’. My birth moment was and is the commissioner for my carnal existence. As such, in that orientational, consciousness relationship I am telemetrically connected to the ethical equity of balance of Cosmic Time. As its involuntary or incidental conduit, I make it possible for the rectifying adjustments of conditions or catalytic thoughts that are ascribed to conditions of serendipity, synchronicity, and karma.

I am one-of-you in form, but not purpose, in this telemetric orientation. I am an anonymous avataric sign of this algorithmic design of logic that is the operating system of this existence.

Telemetric Conduit & Serendipitous Evidentiary Portal

My (and Our) Male mea culpa of gender privilege abuse

My and Our Male mea culpa of gender privilege abuse

Though there are some of us who’d whine and complain; and many, not as mentally and ethically disciplined, who have the thoughts that women have a cultural advantage. But we know that isn’t so, even before the times of accepting the rectitude of aspects of politically (aka, culturally) correct decorum. We’ve known it in our pre-pubescence as we noted the roles of multiple options and opportunity to which we could be chosen or to which we could aspire as males; they weren’t there for females, whose alternative beyond being seen as over-aggressive of pushy-aka, Bitchy-was to be an in an auxiliary or ancillary role to a male.

The world had been constructed to be the oyster gem for males, with or without not being at the top of the pecking order of male privilege. We knew of the wink-and-nod excesses that awaited us, who’d be willing to forsake any moral, let alone ethical limits on our behavior. We had our version of the jihadist ‘72 virgins’ in the here-and-now at that level. (Wasn’t that, subconsciously, a motivation for those who loved the competency and proficiency of excelling at any sport, because there would be cultural female quislings, who in finding a way to make-it in their life would be complicit at that quid pro quo level of privilege?

Though an impractical and fanciful aspiration for many males, we knew that both the cultural, social, and secular environments had been structured so that we could have our micro-version of authoritarian leverage over women, if the circumstances were compromising enough to compel a women to accommodate her integrity and virtue so she could have the position of association or status with a male of position. Even ‘Love’ and romance were part and parcel of the social set-up. Beyond the truly serendipitous and organic scenarios of affection and passion being the result of what was equally esteemed of the virtuous character held between two people of the opposite sex, romance was based on objectified, commercialized, both culturally and socially indoctrinated ethos of expectation which made a social caste system in which the women were at a disadvantage.

The abuses of the famous and notorious are as much the extreme derivations of the micro-aggressions carried on as par for the social and cultural situation that has been the legacy of the power disparity between men and women for generations. Only the rhetorical and intellectual championing by fearless women, followed by anecdotal to now social idolization of women of physical prowess has made clear the reassessment by males of women as pieces of accoutrements in the home and the workplace.

For we men who intimately knew of our utilization of our leveraged social positions with our female contemporaries and who crossed or brazenly flirted with the line of ethical-let alone moral- rectitude with the  females in our social and cultural universe are the unindicted co-conspirators of the more notorious in the news headlines of the present.

In a sense, beyond adherence to some more formalized standards of personal rectitude, so to avoid the political retributions of being apprehended or outed for some irrectitude, we men know that what is needed is more than some restraint on our privileged-to-excess male-id, but our own self-abuse of being complicit in a system of mores to institutional ethos which seeks to exploit the leverage disparities of positions of status and power in this economic order. In the end, has it not been all about on an intimate personal and public-social level “to have or to have not”; those external false standards of accomplishment that makes us

the ‘Male Rats’ we have been?

Complicit-Misogynist